It happens all the time. Curiosities become obsession. Outings become overnighters. Past times become passions. This is how journeys begin.
I’m sure you’re wondering what I’ve been getting up to since my move back home to America. Well, the long and short of it is: not much. I’ve been fortunate enough to get a job as a nanny in order to pay the student loans that have been piling up since 2006, which means I’ve not been so fortunate in finding a “real” job. When you spend a year in London, the land where everything seems to fall into place, it’s difficult to come back to a situation that feels beyond all control.
Upon my return to the States, I admittedly felt a little lost. My friends were oceans away. I’d been plucked from the place that’s felt most home to me. And the realization that it’s much harder to find Prince Harry in a Delaware Target than it is roaming the streets of London was almost too much to bear. If I’m being honest, that feeling of being lost hasn’t actually gone away. It hasn’t even lessened. As each day goes by it just gets a little bit easier to hide. I still wish I could turn to Jordan and have a laugh about the fact that I’ve just fallen on my face in the middle of a store. (Although for that one I did have my mother, which is just as good. I’m graceful to the outside world, but only she will ever fully understand my true inability to stand on two feet.) When I’ve got to dart around town from errand to errand, I long to ditch my car keys and trade them for my Oyster card. (Who would have ever guessed my preferred method of transportation would become public transport.) But that’s what London does- it changes you. The changes were easily adaptable in England, but brought back to America I just feel like a fish out of water. London has made me the best possible version of myself so far. However, I’m putting in every effort to make the most out of the situation I’m in now. And it’s not a bad one by any means. It’s just…different and I’m coping.
However, for the next ten days I get my old life back. I get to take this new self and put it back where it belongs- in London. I’ll have my friends back- the ones who fully understand the power of leaving a journey like this one and what it means to set off on that journey once again. The time it’s taken to get to this point has felt like decades and I know the ten days I’m there will feel like seconds. However, I cannot wait for the rejuvenation that London will provide. I’m finally getting thrown back into the ocean (A horrendous analogy to make two days before flying over the Atlantic.) and even though it’s only for a short period of time, I can’t wait to step off that plane and get back “home”.
The next week and a half is sure to be filled with laughs and adventure. I hope you’ll step back into this journey with me. It’s only right. For old time’s sake.